Recently my plans for the year went under review. Normally when this happens it takes weeks of deliberating and worrying and talking (my housemates deserve a medal for patience) and when I finally make a decision it takes another three weeks to feel that it was the right one. But last Saturday I went to the toilet then washed my hands then stared at myself in the mirror and began a conversation... through it I accepted that I don't want to travel Europe this year, I just want to go home. The idea of roaming a continent on my own biding my time before I get to be in Armidale with my family and friends again sounds like a lonely, stressful adventure. I wouldn't be able to appreciate it at all - I'd only be doing it because I felt that I should while I have the time and money. I know that I used to write that I was frustrated because I didn't have the cash, well I changed my mind, I just want to go home. I'll go home and then save up to come back and visit the UK and do Europe. That's the plan.
So I'm thinking mid September. That's three and a half months away, though heaven knows it could change again. My work contract ends on August 8 and at the moment I can't see myself accepting any more work if it were to come up, so over August I will see some more of the UK and find interesting things to do that don't involve digital screens (meaning I won't just watch TV all the days).
To any UK friends who will read this, please don't take it personally that I'm leaving sooner. I have had such a good time here and whenever I look on flight booking websites I get teary because it's going to be so hard to leave this behind. Anybody knows that I love my church here. Some days when I consider how I'll have to say goodbye I wish I had never come because I don't want my friendships here to fizz out - hell, some of you are like family to me and I'll miss you so badly. But the reality is I believe that coming to the UK was one of the best things I ever did and I'm so grateful for all the beautiful people I've come to know. And I haven't left yet!!
To my Australian friends and family, without contradicting the above paragraph, I can hardly wait....!